A Sign of the Times

I know everyone is dissatisfied with our new administration, but I gotta just say, the state of affairs was a pretty shitty inheritance to begin with. As a high school graduate in 1991, my senior year saaw the destruction of the Berlin Wall. For our 10th anniversary we saw the destruction of the World Trade Towers and the end of any false sense of security that we had as Americans. What will our 20 anniversary bring? I can only imagine, but I've been thinking about it ever since I've started work on the reunion. Yesterday, I went out to run some errands and I saw a sight I'd seen many times before, but for some reason it seemed completely new to me. I live out in the country, in farmland, and at the four way stop up the road, where there is a big gravel flat patch, there was a car parked. This in and of itself wasn't unusual, but there was a new factor that was something I'd never associated with this "neck of the woods." Standing by the road, family gathered around, was a man holding a sign that said "Family in Need." Now, I've seen people holding up signs regarding their own destitution before, especially after liVing in New York, but that's something we normally associate with single individuals. Maybe because if we think of them simply as bums without families that don't live up to societal responsibilities then we don't have to think of all the people that may have been in that person's life. I'd never seen an entire family of "beggars." I know full well that there are millions of people out there, families, living in poverty. Many of my students live in these conditions. There was just something about that scene that struck me, I felt the need to pull over and take a picture, as it seemed to sum up precisely the historical moment so many of us seem to find ourselves in, although we are lucky enough to ponder it and appreciate that it is not us. This family had their car and each other, and they banded together on a hot day to ask for help. Although I wish for the American family to become strong and united, I certainly have to say that I hope never to see it in this circumstance again.

Round and Round and Back to the Same Old Same Old

Meh. That's life at the moment, simply meh. There's a name for it - anhedonia - greek. An - lack of, hedon - pleasure. Not unhappy. Simply.... flavorless. Apparently it's common among meth abusers and bipolar patients. Because both experience such intense highs and lows, anything in the middle is simply, well.... meh. Hard to find motivation when there's no real pleasure in accomplishing something. Course, I haven't accomplished much recently, so I guess I can't say that. I was so excited about vacation and I had a blast! Now I'm not excited about anything. I've heard that being bored is the sign of a boring person. I know life's not boring and there's plenty to be excited about. I just can't feel it right now, and that makes me feel a little.....meh.

Beach Adventure

Just gotback from the beautiful beaches of Clearwater, Florida. Saw some sting rays and my personal favorite, dolphins. They are so beautiful and graceful, and for some unkown reason, they actually appear to like people. Now, beautiful and graceful I can do nothing about, but I'm trying real hard to model the third leg of that triumvirate. It's not always easy. Other people aren't always the biggest problem, ether. I find that more often than not, when a human being lets me down, that very person is me. For instance, I have a problem with money. The less I have, the more I feel the need to spend. It's infuriating. And then I'll go and do something stupid, like lock my keys in my trunk,and I'll set myself back another $400I don't have to begin with. I'm usually okay at the time, I don't panic. I just take care of business, cause what else are you gonna do? Turn back the hands of time and not set down the keys? I would LOVE to have that talent. But.... And Alohomora just doesn't seem to work without the wand. So there we were, stuck in the parking lot of the condo, waiting for the locksmith to arrive, when I came to the realization that my problem with money has to stop. I've taken steps to grownupdom, like opening a savings account and clearing up my credit report, but the reality of being a good money manager has yet to sink in. And it needs to change, soon. Cause right now I'm worth more dead than I am alive. And that bites.

A Standing Motif

More often than not, I seem to begin with "Well, it's been awhile," and this time it's no different. It has been awhile. But the world keeps turning and life goes on regardless of whether or not I document it at any regular interval. Have had a great summer so far, seen many friends and visited many new places. Even bought a new car,which was momentous for me since I've been lucky enough to always get hand-me-downs when I needed wheels. I've always been of the mentality that a car is a car. If it takes you from point a to point b then it has done it's job admirably. I now know how ignorant I was about the fine machine that is the automobile. This car is so fabulous, I don't even know where to begin other than I can now understand people's fascination with them. Smooth and powerful accelleration is a total rush. A guilty pleasure. So, although this post started out with a common, repeated theme, I guess we are here shifting over to the theme of movement, which seems present in several aspects of my life. Love that feeling where new things are happening because I've worked and set them into motion. Makes me feel....effectual. That's a nice place to be.